  Neurodivergent people often do not feel good in their bodies, and it can be easy to believe that this is inevitable. But is it? Here are some practices to help you feel better more often.
When was the last time you felt good in your body? Can you remember? Has it been a while? Being in pain tends to be much more memorable, and even if you don’t live with chronic pain, you may be living with chronic sensory discomfort, anxiety or a heightened sense of threat. But thanks to neuroplasticity, the more often the brain gets these unpleasant sensations, the stronger those pathways get reinforced in the body. This is why it is so important to actively counter those painful/uncomfortable signals—you don’t want them taking up any more real estate in your body than they already do! One way to do this is through meditation. This is a very specific kind of meditation where you try to remember a time that you felt really good in your body. You bring that memory to mind, and then you try to really feel that memory in your body. What were the smells? What did it look like? What were the textures? For me, I love to recall being in the Burren in Ireland. I have Irish roots, and there is no other place on earth I feel quite so at home. It is a strikingly unique place—unusual formations of rocks as far as the eye can see, and a stunning array of wild flowers bursting out of those rocks, as diverse and unexpected as you can possibly imagine. It is a wide, open place, a wild place, but also a subtle place. Tiny little details you have to be looking for or you would miss entirely. It anchors you deeply to a forgotten past, a past that predates humanity. It is vast. It is profound. My two most memorable trips to the Burren were the ones when I went there as soon as got off the airplane. Airplanes are hard for me. I am a bit claustrophobic and I have chemical and sound sensitivities and I can’t sit still or sleep on a plane. On one of those trips, we had been preparing for takeoff from JFK and something prevented us from leaving the ground for what felt like an eternity. The engines were going full force, and the smell of exhaust filled the plane and gave me a vicious migraine. I started to have a panic attack because I could not get out and it seemed insane that we were all having to breathe that in for so long. But of course, the plane did finally take off, and it did eventually land in Shannon, Ireland. From there, it’s just over half an hour to the Burren. And suddenly I was free! Just get out of the car…step into the Burren…and get lost there for as long as you please. This is not just your everyday kind of free, but the deep freedom of the soul when it suddenly finds itself in the best place on earth. What a contrast. There is a meditation practice called Tonglen that reminds me of this Burren experience. There are different ways of doing Tonglen, but perhaps the most common is to think of the pain of others as you inhale and send out compassion/lovingkindness in your exhale. Your breathing becomes a type of filter that transforms the suffering into something beautiful. As someone who has trouble shifting gears, I find Tonglen a challenging practice and can often not do more than 3 complete breaths. I just can’t get my brain to do that transformative work so quickly. But I do think that’s all the more reason to practice it—that tendency to ‘get stuck’ in a certain head space is part of what can prolong pain and discomfort in my life. So sometimes I will imagine the horrible feeling of being stuck on the airplane on my inhale, and then being in the Burren on my exhale. That meditation is about practicing shifting gears. But if I just want to meditate on feeling good in my body, I may focus solely on conjuring up the memory of what it felt like to be in the Burren. I may imagine that the forcefield of energy around me is made up of the Burren, so that I am in fact bringing the Burren with me everywhere I go. It is my strength, my power, my hidden magic. If these kinds of meditations are new to you, no worries! It isn’t something you have to do for a long time. Even if you can just take 5 minutes, it can be enough. What is most important is that you are really able to conjure up what it felt like in your body when you felt really good. You find that moment, and you savor it. Over time, it gets easier to return to that place, for it to really feel like you rather than an isolated memory. So find your moment, relive it, and embrace it as often as possible. Neuroplasticity may be responsible for reinforcing our pain and discomfort over time, but it’s a two way street. Remember how it feels to feel good, and the desirable pathways will get reinforced instead. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com
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 Neurodivergent people often find themselves stuck in a state of chronic stress. Here are some thoughts on why this happens and what you can do to get unstuck.
If you are neurodivergent, you may feel like you are always stuck in a heightened state of threat. You may even think this is part of your wiring and that there’s nothing you can do about it. I’m not really crazy about using metaphors comparing humans to machines, but since talking about our ‘wiring’ seems to click for so many people, I’m going to go with it for now. But rather than thinking of it as your wiring, I prefer to think of it as your ‘default settings.’ Settings is the key word here. As anyone with a phone or a laptop can tell you, settings can always be tweaked. But since humans are much more complex than machines, it can be harder to figure out how to adjust your internal settings. Especially if you have alexithymia (which co-occurs frequently with neurodivergence), meaning that interpreting the signals coming from within you is an ongoing challenge. Having a clearer understanding of what is really going on inside your body can help demystify some of this, so let’s see if we can sort some of it out. Try visualizing for a moment a sound mixing board, such as those used by musicians when recording (see image above). These boards are filled with sliders, so you can adjust the mix of the overall sound in a variety of ways. Boost the bass a bit, bring down those high frequencies a tad, enhance those background vocals so they pop, etc. Your body’s internal settings have some similarities. You will hear people talking about things like ‘hormonal balance,’ for instance, and may have pictured balanced hormones as nice, neat, steady lines. But your hormones actually rely on a constant state of fluctuation to work properly! A snapshot of what your hormones are doing at any given moment would look more like a sound mixing board with the sliders all in different places. Consider the hormone insulin, for example. Every time you eat something, insulin levels are going to rise. Ok, simple enough. But did you know that when insulin is being released, growth hormone cannot be released? Insulin and growth hormone take turns (or they are supposed to, anyhow). Growth hormone is what is responsible for a lot of repair work that happens in the body. It goes to places where there is inflammation and starts fixing the problem. This is why constant grazing throughout the day can lead to excess inflammation—if your insulin is always being released, repair work is being suppressed in the body. Good to know! Now let’s look for a moment at stress hormones. Like insulin, stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline are considered especially critical for our survival. They get released when the body thinks we are under threat. If we have the adrenaline to run at top speed and escape from a predator, it can save our life. Unfortunately in the modern world, our threat response often gets triggered by things that are not actually life threatening, and this creates some problems. Because our bodies are always going to prioritize survival, it will release high amounts of those hormones at the expense of other hormones that are seen as less critical. Reproductive hormones, for example, are not ‘critical.’ If reproduction can’t happen this month, it can always happen next month. We have decades to procreate, and maybe only minutes to escape from this tiger… So when our stress hormones are constantly getting released, it uses up the raw materials that make the other hormones that we need for the day-to-day maintenance of our bodies. Rest and repair? That can wait. So can digestion. And so on… You don’t really need a super complex understanding of all the hormones in your body to get the idea here. To me, just the concept of the slider adjusting levels has been helpful. When I notice that my stress response has been activated, I ask myself “Am I really in danger right now?” And fortunately, the answer is usually no. I then visualize my internal sound board of hormones and imagine the stress slider being cranked up all the way to the top. I then visualize gently bringing the level down. As I imagine that slider going down, I then imagine my rest-and-repair slider going up. I think part of why this visualization has helped me so much is that I used to feel like things were completely on or completely off. More like a light switch than a slider. If you have alexithymia, it can feel like all or nothing, because things don't register until they are REALLY cranked up or bottomed out. For anyone who feels fine one minute, and really angry or overwhelmed the next, the same principle is often at work here. The steps in between are just not registering. It can be really hard to calm down the stress response if we think it is all or nothing. But if we train ourselves to start thinking of small steps it becomes a little easier. What would help me get one notch calmer right now? That’s going to be something simpler to solve than trying to go from being completely activated to completely calm in one fell swoop. Starting to notice those little notches can also help you recognize when things are starting to escalate. And wow…it is so much easier to de-escalate before you are fully activated than to try to calm down once you’re in full-on meltdown mode. You can also think of those little incremental notches on a metronome (yes, I am full of music metaphors today as I do have a background in music). When you just slow down or speed up one notch, you almost don’t even notice it, but over time those little notches add up and make a huge difference! To summarize, there are two things you can do to get started right now in adjusting your ‘default settings.’ The first is to recognize when you are having a stress response and to visualize your stress slider going down and your rest-and-repair slider going up. Just take a minute to imagine it, and remind yourself that if your stress levels are cranked up, other important things that need to happen in your body are going to be put on hold. Do you want to digest your lunch? Ok then, your stress slider needs to come down. The second thing you can try when you feel your stress response being activated is to ask yourself “What would help me get one notch calmer right now?” It might be putting on some relaxing music, getting a few minutes of fresh air outside, taking a walk, or taking some deep breaths. If you are successful and time allows, you could go through multiple rounds of this until you really are feeling pretty calm. Bonus points if you are able to identify the moment your stress response gets activated and can intervene before you are completely amped up! It’s ok if at first you are only able to identify that moment in hind site. You think back on what happened and recognize That Moment when things started to escalate. Reflecting on past episodes really will help you get better at intervening earlier on in the future. In my next post I will discuss another technique for shifting gears that is all about cultivating the ability to feel good in your body. Feeling good in the body! Yes! I think we could all use more of that…. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com  Neurodivergent people often do not feel good in their bodies, and it can be easy to believe that this is inevitable. But is it? Here are some practices to help you feel better more often.
When was the last time you felt good in your body? Can you remember? Has it been a while? Being in pain tends to be much more memorable, and even if you don’t live with chronic pain, you may be living with chronic sensory discomfort, anxiety or a heightened sense of threat. But thanks to neuroplasticity, the more often the brain gets these unpleasant sensations, the stronger those pathways get reinforced in the body. This is why it is so important to actively counter those painful/uncomfortable signals—you don’t want them taking up any more real estate in your body than they already do! One way to do this is through meditation. This is a very specific kind of mediation where you try to remember a time that you felt really good in your body. You bring that memory to mind, and then you try to really feel that memory in your body. What were the smells? What did it look like? What were the textures? For me, I love to recall being in the Burren in Ireland. I have Irish roots, and there is no other place on earth I feel quite so at home. It is a strikingly unique place—unusual formations of rocks as far as the eye can see, and a stunning array of wild flowers bursting out of those rocks, as diverse and unexpected as you can possibly imagine. It is a wide, open place, a wild place, but also a subtle place. Tiny little details you have to be looking for or you would miss entirely. It anchors you deeply to a forgotten past, a past that predates humanity. It is vast. It is profound. My two most memorable trips to the Burren were the ones when I went there as soon as got off the airplane. Airplanes are hard for me. I am a bit claustrophobic and I have chemical and sound sensitivities and I can’t sit still or sleep on a plane. On one of those trips, we had been preparing for takeoff from JFK and something prevented us from leaving the ground for what felt like an eternity. The engines were going full force, and the smell of exhaust filled the plane and gave me a vicious migraine. I started to have a panic attack because I could not get out and it seemed insane that we were all having to breathe that in for so long. But of course, the plane did finally take off, and it did eventually land in Shannon, Ireland. From there, it’s just over half an hour to the Burren. And suddenly I was free! Just get out of the car…step into the Burren…and get lost there for as long as you please. This is not just your everyday kind of free, but the deep freedom of the soul when it suddenly finds itself in the best place on earth. What a contrast. There is a meditation practice called Tonglen that reminds me of this Burren experience. There are different ways of doing Tonglen, but perhaps the most common is to think of the pain of others as you inhale and send out compassion/lovingkindness in your exhale. Your breathing becomes a type of filter that transforms the suffering into something beautiful. As someone who has trouble shifting gears, I find Tonglen a challenging practice and can often not do more than 3 complete breaths. I just can’t get my brain to do that transformative work so quickly. But I do think that’s all the more reason to practice it—that tendency to ‘get stuck’ in a certain head space is part of what can prolong pain and discomfort in my life. So sometimes I will imagine the horrible feeling of being stuck on the airplane on my inhale, and then being in the Burren on my exhale. That meditation is about practicing shifting gears. But if I just want to meditate on feeling good in my body, I may focus solely on conjuring up the memory of what it felt like to be in the Burren. I may imagine that the forcefield of energy around me is made up of the Burren, so that I am in fact bringing the Burren with me everywhere I go. It is my strength, my power, my hidden magic. If these kinds of meditations are new to you, no worries! It isn’t something you have to do for a long time. Even if you can just take 5 minutes, it can be enough. What is most important is that you are really able to conjure up what it felt like in your body when you felt really good. You find that moment, and you savor it. Over time, it gets easier to return to that place, for it to really feel like you rather than an isolated memory. So find your moment, relive it, and embrace it as often as possible. Neuroplasticity may be responsible for reinforcing our pain and discomfort over time, but it’s a two way street. Remember how it feels to feel good, and the desirable pathways will get reinforced instead. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com  Being neurodivergent often means living with higher levels of pain. Why? There are many reasons. We are much more prone to hyper mobility and/or EDS, meaning we get injured more easily.
We are more prone to migraines, allergies, GI problems and can be so highly sensitive that everyday things like background fans, fluorescent lighting or someone’s aftershave can literally cause us pain. But our heightened sensitivity can also be a problem when it comes to pharmaceuticals. We are more prone to experiencing negative side effects, especially those of us who are autistic. This has led many to explore alternative strategies for dealing with chronic pain (myself included!). In this article, I will discuss how chronic pain is addressed from the standpoint of holistic herbalism. Approaching chronic pain holistically means viewing the situation from multiple angles for a highly nuanced and focused strategy that is tailored to each individuals unique presentation. While I'm going to give an overview here of all of the layers that are considered when it comes to chronic pain, keep in mind that a clinical herbalist (which I am training to be) customizes a plan that is appropriate for each person they work with. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to pain. A lot of these strategies take time to have their greatest impact--but within a month most people see results and they get better over time. Of course, many are skeptical that it's worth the effort. For anyone with a high level of pain that has persisted for a number of years, there can be doubt about how effective herbs can be for 'real pain.' But keep in mind that the holistic approach gets to the actual sources of the pain (which is largely not how pharmaceuticals work) and without the nasty side effects. That's part of the reason it takes longer--pain is complex and there is a lot to address. Ideally we don't just want to numb the pain--we want systemic repair work to happen that gets the whole body working better. That takes time. Keep in mind too that in pain lasting longer than 3-6 months, the original cause of the pain is no longer the main driver. This is because the more frequently a nerve pain signal goes off, the stronger/more entrenched the signal gets, even if the original ‘injury’ is recovering. This is how we can get stuck in chronic pain even when the original problem has gotten better. Because of this phenomenon, part of the protocol needs to address the over-sensitization of the nervous system (a common feature in neurodivergence), as well as out of control inflammation and the root causes of the pain. Fortunately, there are a number of interventions that can help with both the origin of the pain and the spinoff pain that can follow. Here is a summary of some holistic strategies I am learning about as a student through CommonWealth Holistic Herbalism for chronic pain: 1.) Address excess inflammation
3.) Release tension - Tension can be the primary driver of pain, but even if it is not, almost everyone with chronic pain will have some tension as a secondary response to the pain. The body can tense up to protect an area of injury, so sometimes it can be hard to release the tension we are carrying as it can make us feel too vulnerable. If you take something highly relaxing, remind yourself that releasing tension will allow detritus to be carried out and fresh blood and nutrients to get in where they are needed. Supports:
 Stress is often amplified for those of us who are neurodivergent due to having more vulnerable nervous systems. Here are some herbs that can help you build more resilience to life’s stressors over time.
Anybody feeling stressed out? I’m just going to assume that’s a yes. It’s great if you can actually reduce your stress load, but we all know that isn’t always possible. In fact, as I’m writing this, I’m just coming out of a 9 day period of intense stress that was completely unavoidable that had me totally bent out of whack. Thankfully I’m on the other side of it now. And thankfully I had a lot of herbs on hand to help me ride out the storm... In my last post I covered nervine herbs that are helpful in times of acute stress. Today, I want to look at a group of herbs called adaptogens. These herbs may or may not have an immediate effect, but will help you build your capacity to manage stress better over time. A lot of the more famous adaptogens are not ones I am going to discuss today. Many of them can be very stimulating and it can be highly tempting to take them in order to be more productive when what you should really be doing is resting. That may be fine in an emergency situation (let’s say your best friend is getting married in another country and you have to rally so hard to have the energy to get through the wedding weekend), but as an ongoing strategy it will only lead to burnout, which many neurodivergent people are already dealing with. Instead, I am going to focus on the more gentle and restorative adaptogens that are also the most safe and beneficial. So let’s get started. Tulsi - (Ocimum sanctum, O. tenuiflorum) If you read my last post, you may remember that tulsi made it on that list as well. With tulsi, you do get both immediate relief and long-term benefits. This is a fabulous herb to go with if stress gets you craving things like sugar, alcohol, or compulsive use of drugs or alcohol. Or even if you are trying to cut back on something like cannabis and are having a hard time. Try tulsi if anxiety tends to constantly weigh you down and you need a little lift. Or if stress tends to go to your gut and you tend to need some extra digestive support. Almost everyone likes the smell and taste, and it blends really well with other herbs that maybe don’t taste as great but you are taking for medicinal reasons. Tulsi will make it all a little nicer! Think of tulsi if you are prone to getting stuck, which can be a common feature of autism, but can also be a feature of depression or simply tension in the muscles. Tulsi is safe for almost anyone of any age, but if you are on medications that lower blood sugar, be aware that tulsi can amplify those effects, so be sure to monitor carefully under the supervision of a doctor. Ashwaghanda -Withania somnifera I highly recommend ashwaghanda if you are in perimenopause and especially if stress has a tendency to disrupt your sleep. This herb is all about cycles (menstrual, circadian, etc.) and helps you get back into our natural rhythms. If you are allergic to nightshades though, you probably won’t be able to work with it. Ashwaghanda will help build up your parasympathetic nervous system, making it a strong ally for recovering from many kinds of illness, as well as burnout. If you tend to be depleted and exhausted, ashwaghanda can help. Ongoing autoimmune or chronic health issues can also be a place where ashwaghanda shines (and are times when more stimulating adaptogens would be absolutely contraindicated). Astragalus - Astragalus membranaceus If stress has a tendency to make you prone to getting sick all the time, astragalus is definitely one to consider. It will boost your immune system and help you ward off infections better, especially viral infections. This works both for prevention and if you are recovering from an illness (COVID, for example). A few words of caution though--it is NOT advised to take astragalus during the acute phase of an illness, or while you are on any kind of immune suppressing medications. Astragalus works best if you do a long, slow decoction. It is fantastic to add to things like bone broth that you will be simmering for many, many hours. If that isn’t realistic for you and a tincture is the only realistic way you can take it, look for (or make) a double extraction. Some of the benefits are extracted in water, others in alcohol, so with a double extraction you will get more full spectrum medicine. This still is not likely to be as effective as a long decoction, but it is absolutely better than not getting any astragalus at all! Licorice - Glycyrrhiza glabra So are you a lover or a hater of licorice? I totally love the taste of licorice, but there are plenty of folks who just can’t stand it. If you are one of those, I wouldn’t try working with it every day. You are just not likely to stick with it. This is another one of those herbs that works great in a formula, and just makes all the other herbs blend together really nicely. But it does a lot on its own too. Licorice is helpful when stress has led to adrenal exhaustion. For that reason, it is another herb that’s appropriate when approaching menopause, because that’s when the adrenals actually start producing estrogen instead of the ovaries. If you’ve already been under a lot of stress and suddenly your adrenals have a whole new job to do that they’ve never done before, they might get cranky! Licorice can help. It is particularly suitable for folks with a dry constitution--prone to constipation, dry coughs, eczema and psoriasis, etc. It does raise blood pressure, but for those of us with EDS and/or POTS, that can actually be a good thing! If you already have high blood pressure though, just stick with using it only in formulas and not by itself. You can also get DGL licorice so that your blood pressure won’t be affected, but keep in mind that using it this way will primarily help GI issues (heartburn, ulcers, etc.) and will not give you the full spectrum of benefits that you may be seeking from an adaptogenic herb. Reishi - Ganoderma lucidum Reishi has been calling to me lately. That’s a good sign--if you start craving a particular herb (or fungi in this case!) or it’s coming to your mind or attention a lot, take notice and consider getting together :). I think it is a very precious medicine for neurodivergent humans, particularly for calming over-reactive responses in the body and nervous system. It is THE best thing for when you haven’t slept and are feeling what I call ‘crazy brain.’ Like tulsi, I do think it has some immediate effects that you notice right away, in addition to help build and restore your adrenal function over time and your capacity to rest, digest and repair. You do have to work for it to get the best results. It gets quite potent when you do a very long, slow decoction over a number of hours (or you simply decoct the same slices multiple times). The taste is kind of terrible though, FYI, but in a way I have come to love. There are other options that are beneficial, just to a lesser extent. You can get it as a tincture, but again, get the double extraction. If you go for capsules, make sure you get the whole fruiting body (not the mycelium alone). And do be sure to buy slices rather than the whole mushroom. Unless you have a really good hacksaw and want to spend hours slicing it all up. Seriously, that is how hard they are and there are no shortcuts here. If that all sounds like too much work, the one herb that is somewhat comparable is angelica. It is not technically considered an adaptogen, but I am not the only one who thinks maybe it should be. Both reishi and angelica fill me with a sense of equanimity that makes me feel strong and capable and sane when things around me are insane. Highly recommended! Reishi is considered extremely safe, but if you take a lot of medications you should talk to your doctor. A potential concern here would be blood thinners (they are the most problematic in terms of herbal interactions). Not that long ago, they used to say not to use reishi if you had an autoimmune condition, but more recently it has been clarified that it is immunomodulating rather than immunostimulating, so it is not a problem. It will lower your blood sugar, so pay attention if you are diabetic. Of course, adaptogens are only going to be one part of your toolbox for handling stress, but they can be quite powerful, especially when you are just feeling so overwhelmed and stressed out that you just want to crawl into bed and hide under the covers. Or whatever. Times are stressful, and we all need support. Herbs (and fungi!) are here to help! Note: This is not medical advice. I am a neurodivergent coach, educator and holistic herbalist, and I do not diagnose or treat any condition. The information here is for educational purposes only and to share my own experiences as an autistic woman. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com  Being neurodivergent often means having a more sensitive/vulnerable nervous system. Here are some herbs you can turn to in times of acute stress to take a bit of the edge off.
There are two main categories of herbs I want to discuss as a support for dealing with stress, so I’m going to divide this post into two parts. The first group are called nervines, and they are for acute situations when you are feeling stressed out and are trying to calm down. The second group are called adaptogens, and they help build your body’s capacity to handle stress better over time. I will focus on nervines today and on adaptogens in part two. I’d also like to state up front that ideally, you want to be working with herbs that match your personal constitution. There isn’t a one-size-fits-all herb for stress that works for everyone, or even for all neurodivergent people. For example, if you are that person that is always freezing and reaching for that extra sweater, you don’t want to be taking an herb that is just going to make you more cold. You need to warm up! And since people feel stress differently in their bodies, you want to select your herbs based on your personal experience of stress. But since we can’t do that kind of customization in an article like this, I’m going to stick with some very safe herbs that still tend to be highly effective for a broad range of people. Chamomile (Matricaria recutita) Have you ever wondered why chamomile is always around? It’s because it is helpful for so many things, is super safe and works for just about anyone’s constitution (unless you’re allergic). But this can make it seem so ordinary and ho-hum that it’s easy to overlook it as a potent helper—and then we spend way too much money and create a huge eco footprint to try some exotic herb from the other side of the world instead. Rethink that strategy! To really get the full benefits of chamomile, you will want to make a very strong infusion with a good quality herb and steep it for at least 30 minutes. That will unleash its stronger muscle relaxing properties, soothe the nervous system, and even relieve the pain of menstrual cramps or digestive upset. Use multiple tea bags if you have them, and if this strategy works for you, consider buying it in bulk as it will save you a lot of money and the loose herb will be even more effective. This is a particularly great herb for people who get really tense when they are stressed out. A great choice for children too! Rose Petals (Rosa canina, R. multiflora, R. rugosa ) Rose is a wonderful herb to turn to if stress leaves you feeling vulnerable and unprotected and just wanting to curl up on ball on your bed and shut out the world. Call on its thorns as a shield from all harm! That’s what the little critters do when they take shelter under a rose bush. The smell alone can help bring about an instant shift in the body. Because of its soothing and anti-inflammatory effect, it is also a great choice when stress is contributing to systemic inflammation in the body (or spirit) that is agitated and wearing you down. It has a drying effect that is helpful for anyone who is on the damp side (carrying around a bit of extra water perhaps, which can also show up as thing like looser stools or leaky gut). Consider pairing with hawthorn if you have heightened sensitivity and/or get heart palpitations when stressed. Linden leaves and flowers (Tilia americana & cordata) If you get hot and agitated when you are stressed out, give linden a try. Like rose, it has a lovely floral scent that can be instantly soothing. Almost everyone thinks it tastes food too. For those with ADHD, it will help even out the side effects from things like Ritalin and Adderal. Since stress can also contribute to autoimmune flare-ups and snacking on less than ideal comfort food, it’s good to know that linden also supports those with the nerve pain associated with things like fibromyalgia and MS as well as the pain that can come from eating foods that are not ideal for your body. Linden is moistening, and the longer you infuse it, the more moistening it will get (you can even infuse it overnight!). If you physically run dry, or have nerves that are hot and frazzled, linden will help. This is another good choice for the kiddos. Tulsi (Ocimum sanctum, O. tenuiflorum) Warming, drying and oh so relaxing, tulsi is the herb of choice when stress leads to sugar cravings or compulsive use of drugs and alcohol. Tulsi is also an adaptogen, so we will discuss it more in Part 2, but just be aware that those benefits are going to be cumulative and you will not be ‘cured’ by drinking a single cup of it. It does have some immediate effects though and is often associated with just generally lifting the mood and releasing anxiety. The taste and smell are very appealing to most people (kind of like a sweet and spicy basil, which it is related to). It also has some digestive actions that can be helpful when stresses impacting digestion. Tulsi is safe for almost anyone of any age, but if you are on medications that lower blood sugar, be aware that tulsi can amplify those effects, so be sure to monitor carefully under the supervision of a doctor. *** This is not an exhaustive list of nerviness by any means. If stress gives you insomnia, definitely check out my article “Herbs the Support Better Sleep.” Just enter the title into the search bar on my blog and it will get you right to it. And keep in mind that while these are all teas you can get immediate benefit from, you will get other cumulative benefits over time and with larger quantities. If you really want to do a deep dive into finding your herbal allies, consider spending a lot of time with one of these herbs for a month. Try having a quart of tea of your chosen herb every day—that’s four cups. I have one of those carafes that fits a quart of liquid and it stays hot all day (you can even make it the night before, then put in a thermos to carry with you all day instead of water). And keep in mind that tea does not have to be hot—that’s good to remember as the warmer months approach. When it gets really hot, I like mixing certain teas (lemon balm would be an excellent one to look into when it’s hot and you’re stressed out) with some club soda and serving with ice. So refreshing! And if tea is not your thing, you could also try tinctures. You can carry a little bottle around with you everywhere you go and just take a dropperful maybe 3x/day or so. They cost more than tea, but they are super convenient and they are also super easy to make yourself if you are so inclined. I have said it before and I will say it again—herbs are a lot like people. Even if on paper they check all the right boxes, you may not necessarily have chemistry with everything you try out. So do your research, keep experimenting, and in time you will find your herbal allies. Here’s to building more resilience in these challenging and stressful times with the help of our herbal partners! Note: This is not medical advice. I am a neurodivergent coach, educator and holistic herbalist, and I do not diagnose or treat any condition. The information here is for educational purposes only and to share my own experiences as an autistic woman. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com  Having trouble sleeping? You’re not alone. Here are my six favorite practices for neurodivergent folks that really help.
There are a lot of people writing a lot of things about sleep these days, and there’s a good chance this isn’t the first article you have read in the last year on how to improve your sleep. I’m going to assume that you are already aware of how many of us are simply not getting enough sleep (neurodivergent folks in particular), and just get right to the heart of which things I have found most helpful. If you’re looking for something more in-depth about why neurodivergent people in particular struggle with sleep, click here for an in-depth article from Neurodivergent Insights. Here are my top tips: 1.) Re-establish your circadian rhythm. Herbs like ashwaghanda can really help with this, but if you are allergic to nightshades that is not going to be an option for you (sorry about that—I’m allergic too). Another way to do this that won’t cost you anything is to go out and see the sunrise every morning. I finally got around to trying this earlier this year (I really had no excuse not to because these days I work from home 95% of the time). It takes about 15 minutes total to walk through the woods to where I can really see the sun (assuming it’s not all clouded over) and then back to the house. Wow! This really works. I noticed a difference within days. It was especially helpful for me in falling asleep sooner. I’m still waking up some during the night, but getting to sleep a lot sooner goes a long way. My husband and I typically have our coffee/tea on the sofa together when we first wake up, so we are simply cutting that a little shorter and continuing to talk and go at our own pace as we make our way towards the sun. In a few months, the sun will be up before we are, but my understanding is that if you get out in sunlight for 10-15 minutes at least before 10 am you will still get these benefits. I’ll keep you posted! Of course mornings are not always this leisurely and this is not realistic for everyone. On days when I have to be out and about early, I do try to find a few moments to at least connect with the sun. Where is it? If I’m outside, can I feel it on my face? If I’m driving, I know I have a tendency to see it as a nuisance (I am very sensitive to light) and get annoyed if the sun is in my eyes. But this practice of taking a moment to connect with it instead of experiencing it as an obstacle has really helped me. Whatever chaotic, stressful events may be happening in my morning, there’s the sun, just doing its thing. Connecting with that helps me not get too caught up in that stress and remember that I am part of something much bigger. Aligning with the sun’s predictable rhythm is regulating and grounding. And that’s good for good sleep! If you can’t get outside before 10, getting out during your lunch break or whenever you have a break in the day will also be helpful. Natural light sends powerful cues to our body that it is time to be awake and active. The more of those cues we get, the more receptive we will be to the cues for when it is time to slow down and get some sleep. 2.) Avoid getting amped up before bedtime - When I was a little kid, my dad would come into our rooms at bedtime and we would kneel beside the bed and say our prayers with him. In retrospect, I don’t think this was the best time of day to do that, sweet a the gesture was. I would start thinking about all the problems in the world and everyone who needed help and I would lie in bed and worry about everything. Now that I am an adult, I have learned that what I need in the evening is to focus on things that are going to help me wind down. It is going to take me a while. Something that has really helped me is coming up with my cut-off point in the evening for when I will use electronics. That includes phone calls, texting, social, media, email….everything! I am like a little kid who can get really amped up and then have a lot of trouble winding down. Unexpected news, whether positive or negative, can make me really hyper in a way that is not conducive to sleep! And while almost every email I get is pretty ho-hum, it only takes one to get me going, and that’s one too many. So I am pretty strict about adhering to this time. I also start transitioning with books or audiobooks. After a certain point in the evening, even the books need to be more on the calming side. A little bit interesting, but nothing too suspenseful. History books are my go-to. 3.) Make your room dark at bedtime. My room is a dark place. My phone does not go there. I do have Alexa, and this is how I play audiobooks before sleeping. But even Alexa I have tucked away, out of sight, so there is no little beam of blue light visible anywhere. The light on my HEPA filter has also been covered (just be sure to check for when the filter needs replacing if you do this). I do not have blackout curtains because of my severe dust allergies, but when it starts getting light later in the evening and earlier in the morning (we’re just at the beginning of that season now), I sleep with an eye mask that keeps me in total darkness. The darkness is so important. Light suppresses our melatonin, which cues our sleepiness. But if you are neurodivergent and have sensory processing issues that involve sensitivity to light, this is even more important. I would say critical. I know a lot of people scroll on their phones in bed and that this is especially problematic because blue light is the one that suppresses melatonin the most. If this is a habit you just can’t break, at least adjust your phone settings to block blue light at night. This process of it getting dark should ideally happen before bedtime. It does get dark gradually outside, so you can simulate this by using light dimmers or just less light in general after a certain time in the evening. And again, be sure to use blue light filters on your screens if you must use screens. 4.) Heating Pad in Bed. This is a 2-for-1. Tension can keep you awake, and heat relaxes tension. But a heating pad will also help energy descend from your head down into your body. A lot of neurodivergent people get stuck in their heads, with thoughts swirling around in circles, keeping us up for hours on end. I find that putting the heating pad just below my neck and covering most of my back is a very effective intervention. As the blood rushes to my core, it feels like a stopper is released from my head so that everything that was stuck up there can finally trickle down. Ahh! Then the sleepiness follows. 5.) Pulse-Dosing Herbs Before Bedtime. If you didn’t read my article last week, that was what it was all about. You start with some tincture with your sleepy-time herbs an hour before bedtime, then a half hour before, then right at bedtime. This allows for a more natural and gradual slowing down process. A lot of people find it helpful to set a timer for when to start pulse-dosing. You can customize your herbs depending on what your specific issues are—there is not a one-size-fits-all herb that is good for everyone and everything. Read the last post for how to find the right herbs for you. 6.) Have a Plan for Waking up in the Night - If you do wake up in the night, it can make all the difference if you have a plan in place. The important thing is that you don’t lie there letting your thoughts go all over the place, worrying about how awful everything is going to be in the morning because you haven’t gotten enough sleep. Instead, you need to occupy your mind with other things to help it go back to sleep and not trapped in worry-mode. Here’s the protocol I use. First, I have my go-to herbal tinctures or capsules on the bedside table. Then, I’ll pull up an audiobook on Alexa, one that I’ve heard before, has a calm narrator whose voice has a steady volume, and is just interesting enough but not riveting. This is similar to my night time routine with audiobooks, but in this case I prefer a book I have heard before so that I won’t be worried about missing anything when I fall back to sleep. My very favorite trick though is this alphabet word game. I don’t even know what this technique is called or who came up with it. But it works so well when I wake up in the middle of the night! I choose a letter of the alphabet, then start coming up with words that start with that letter. I go through the vowels in order. So, for example, If I choose ‘B’ and start with the vowel ‘A,’ the list might be ‘baby, baboon, babble, back, bad, baffle, bag, baggage, ball, banana….’ and so on through the alphabet. Then I move on to B-E words, then B-I, then B-O, etc. It can take a while, but the alternative for me might be staying wide awake for hours (especially now that I’m in perimenopause). This is much better. It does take some trial and error to figure out which practices are going to help you the most, but the good news is that there is bound to be something helpful out there if you are willing to do some experimenting. The key is getting convinced that yes, sleep is actually really important and that your body is doing all sorts of critical jobs while you are conked out in bed. Believe it. And if you find something that really knocks you out (oh dear, I think that’s a pun…), feel free to leave a comment below. We can always use more tools in our toolbox!  A lot of us neurodivergent folks have a harder time getting good sleep. Working with certain herbs customized to our individual needs before bedtime (using a specific method called Pulse-Dosing) can be incredibly helpful.
I wish I had a magic herb that could reliably give us all a good night’s sleep. Too many of us are simply not getting enough! The thing is, we are not all lying in bed awake for the same reasons, so it’s not that simple. There is not a single herb or group of herbs that are right for everyone, or even ones that are right for all neurodivergent people. We may share certain traits/characteristics, but it looks a little different for everyone. Improving the quality of your sleep typically requires a number of sleep hygiene interventions, but I’m not going to get into all of that in this post (I will get to that next time though). Instead, I’m going to list some of the more common issues that keep neurodivergent people awake and then the herbs that you can work with for those issues. That way, you can get a better idea of which herbs you might want to partner with. Before I do that though, I do want to share a practice I learned about in herb school that has been incredibly helpful for me and can be useful for anyone. It’s called Pulse-Dosing. The idea is that instead of taking a bunch of herbs right at bedtime or when you wake up in the middle of the night, you start an hour before bedtime with a small dose of your chosen herb/s, then take another small dose half an hour before bedtime, and a final dose right at bedtime. For reasons that are probably obvious, I do not suggest taking these herbs as tea (unless you have a superhuman bladder). Tinctures work really well, and sometimes capsules can be effective as well. There are some issues with capsules though. Good ones tend to be spendy (like Gaia herbs or Oregon’s Wild Harvest). You could get a capsule machine and make your own, but keep in mind that if you do that you need to know which herbs actually work in capsule form, use your homemade ones within 2-4 weeks (herbs break down much more quickly in powdered form), and take at least four capsules at a time as they aren’t as concentrated as the ones that are commercially produced. Pulse-Dosing is where it is at! Seriously, you will get much better results with this method than you would if you took all of those herbs right at bedtime. Think about the sun going down. It’s not like a switch is flipped and lights are out. It happens gradually. Our bodies evolved for a more gradual winding down process. This is where it’s at. Ok, so now let’s talk about herbs that can help you wind down. Some of the issues I hear about most frequently for neurodivergent people having trouble sleeping are anxiety, being stuck in their head, tension, pain and things like elevated cortisol levels/disrupted circadian rhythms. There are herbs that you can work with specifically for each of those issues, so let’s take a look. Anxiety / Being stuck in your Head Motherwort, Passionflower and Skullcap are my my personal favorites here, and they also all work well when paired together. I’ve seen a number of women turn to Motherwort for the first time in perimenopause, when insomnia can be a major issue. Because I am so prone to getting amped up and it takes me a long time to wind down, I will often start with a cup of motherwort tea right after dinner and then do my Pulse-Dosing closer to bedtime. I am prone to heart palpitations, and it is really shines there as an herb that will calm the heart. It is also indicated when waking up frequently in the night. Combined with mugwort, it is well-suited for people who have a tendency to wake up in the middle of the night or throughout the night. One caution about Motherwort though—do not use it during your period if you are a heavy bleeder. Or if you do, have some yarrow as well (at any point in the day) as the yarrow will lessen the bleeding substantially. Passionflower is wonderful when you have racing thoughts that can go round and round in circles or get obsessive. It is quite safe, and in large doses (1 TBS tincture) it actually becomes a pain killer as well. Skullcap is excellent for anxiety that manifests as tension, especially in the neck/jaw/shoulders/upper back. If you get headaches from that kind of tension, give it a try (perhaps combined with meadowsweet for neuro-inflammation). Like Passionflower, it will help you with those racing thoughts that are keeping you awake, and they are often combined to create an even more potent, synergistic effect. Calamus and Wood Betony are also worth considering for energy that gets stuck in the head and is having a hard time moving down (whether or not there is an anxiety component). These will both help with grounding/feeling rooted, which can be a big part of getting off to sleep. You can actually just chew on a little piece of calamus root (so maybe do that before you brush your teeth!). Wood betony often helps other herbs work better, so it is usually part of a formula and something you can be on the lookout for when checking out a bedtime blend. Muscular Tension As mentioned above, skullcap is terrific for tension in the upper body, but for a more general relaxing effect, consider chamomile. You would need to experiment with how much tincture to take to be a profound muscle relaxer for more extreme cases, but as a tea if you make it with 2 TBS dried herb (that’s a lot!) and let it steep for half an hour, it will be quite strong. Very effective for menstrual cramps too. It is just about the safest herb out there, so just about anyone can give it a try. Kava kava is another excellent choice for tension, but this one should not be used in high doses or for large periods of time. It can be hard on the liver, so save it more for acute situations like panic attacks or when you are traveling or having guests (if those things stress you out like they do me!). Pain There is not an easy answer for pain because there are so many things that can cause it. If tension is a big part of it, the herbs in the last section could be very helpful. Just about any herb is going to have an anti-anti-inflammatory effect, but something like meadowsweet is known specifically to lower inflammation without causing any of the damage that NSAIDS do. Wild lettuce is often turned to when there is pain that is preventing sleep because it is a nervine sedative in addition to reducing pain. Elevated cortisol/ Circadian rhythm If this is what is keeping you awake at night, I highly recommend you look into adaptogenic herbs and see which one is right for you. In general, this group of herbs helps your body adapt better to stress over time. Ashwaghanda is the one that is especially known for restoring your circadian rhythm, and for a lot of women is incredibly helpful during perimenopause. It’s not actually a sedative, so you may want to experiment with when to take it to be alert during the day and then get sleepy at night. However, if like me you are allergic to nightshades, you will not be able to work with Ashwaghanda. Such a bummer. The good news is that there are many other adaptogenic herbs that you can try out instead. Licorice, for example, is appropriate for elevated cortisol. Definitely use it in a formula though as it can raise blood pressure and not everyone loves the taste. (which is crazy because it’s delicious—not that I’m biased or anything…). Licorice does kind of amp me up though (and is often used by people with chronic fatigue), so I do not recommend working with it at bedtime. If you take it for a month during the day, pay attention to what happens at bedtime. When you land on the right amount for your body, it should have an impact on evening out those dreaded cortisol spikes at night. Remember that herbs are a lot like people. You will have chemistry with some, and others will rub you the wrong way or just won’t make much of an impression. Keep trying things out until you find your friends. They are out there. And especially if you are on medications, do your research before trying any new herbs. I know the internet is not always the best place to get good info these days, so ask a trained professional if there is any doubt. Herbs are powerful, and not all herbs and medications can be taken together. In the next post I will tackle some of the other practices you can do to improve your sleep hygiene at night and even throughout the day. Sleep is so important, and so many of us are just not getting anywhere near enough. Let me know if you have found herbal partners that have helped you sleep more. Note: This is not medical advice. I am a neurodivergent coach, educator and family herbalist, and I do not diagnose or treat any condition. The information here is for educational purposes only and to share my own experiences as an autistic woman. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com  Autism and ADHD have a number of overlapping traits, but they are distinct. You can also have both, which is known as AuDHD. Here's what you need to know.
Is it possible to have both ADHD and autism? Yes! This is sometimes abbreviated as AuDHD and it is starting to become more widely recognized. It is a bit tricky to diagnose as there are overlapping traits for both diagnoses, and getting misdiagnosed with one when you really have the other is common too. Let’s take a closer look. Some of the shared traits between ADHD and autism that may be most obvious are things like being unable to sit still (fidgeting, stimming, etc.), having more challenges with social interactions, and having intense passions/ special interests. With both diagnoses, there are issues with executive functioning skills, so getting through your to-do list can be harder. Frequent interruptions may be more difficult to bounce back from, and switching tasks can be challenging. Emotional regulation is also often a key issue, and it is common to get stuck in a fight-flight state of high stress, or a sluggish, shut-down state where it feels impossible to get anything done. Until very recently, girls usually flew under the radar for both ADHD and autism. Some families still seem to find it more socially acceptable to have a diagnosis of ADHD rather than autism, but that is rapidly changing as more and more people are coming to recognize that autism doesn’t have to ‘look’ like the outdated stereotype we may have grown up with. It is not uncommon these days to meet a girl who was diagnosed with ADHD in childhood who discovered at a later point that she was actually autistic. According to Dr. Megan Anna Neff (who has AuDHD), 30-65% of children with ADHD have clinically significant autistic traits. At this time, no one can say exactly how many of these children may have been misdiagnosed and how many of them have autism as a co-occurring condition. However, it is generally agreed on that more than half of people who have ADHD or autism will have at least one other condition, so co-occurrence does happen frequently. How do we know that ADHD and autism aren’t really the same thing then when there is so much overlap? Well, the differences can be pretty significant too. For one thing, there are medications for ADHD. There are not drugs specifically for autism. Giving ADHD meds to someone who is actually autistic can be a really bad idea. If you don’t have ADHD, stimulants can really amp you up and may increase anxiety levels, make it harder to sleep, etc. And the side effects are likely to be worse. But that’s not the only difference. An autistic person tends to need a lot of routine, and may tend to eat the same food every day and do the same tasks in the same order whenever possible. On the other hand, an ADHD person tends to have a high need for novelty, and may find it impossible to stick to any sort of routine. Those with AuDHD sometimes feel like there is a tug-of-war going on inside of them. During a highly creative streak, they may start a huge project and dive in head first, only to wake up the next morning thinking “What have I done...Why did you do this to me?!?” Other times the traits might seem to cancel each other out. You might jump into the creative project but then start organizing it and adjusting the routine to fit it in before it upsets the balance of your day. In a best case scenario, the ADHD might bring more flexibility, variety and creativity, while the autism reigns in the impulses and keeps everything more organized. It can go either way! It's also possible that one of the two will be dominant for you. In my own case, I am autism-dominant, so that my autism is usually 'in charge,' but a hint of ADHD shakes things up from time to time. Understanding the nuances of your wiring can be so helpful. For those of us that need both variety and routine, being able to implement some sort of flexible schedule can make an enormous difference. Many AuDHD folks thrive being self-employed and/or working from home so that they can get these kinds of needs met. Neurodivergence can challenge us in many ways, but it is this unique wiring that also allows us to be the innovative, creative problem solvers the world needs. Keep paying attention to what your brain is telling you. This is how we figure out how to thrive, and that is ultimately what it’s all about. Arika Rapson is a neurodivergent coach, herbalist and educator and writes frequently about her own experience as an autistic woman. She holds a MA from Stony Brook University and has coaching certification through IBCCES. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com  How my day got totally derailed when I was not able to stick with my routine as an autistic woman and what I did to salvage it.
I’ve been sharing my experiences in these posts for about six months now, almost every single week, and this is the first time I have encountered writer’s block. So I ask myself—why is that? And the answer is right there. I just forgot about reality for a minute, but I’m back now. I always write on Fridays, and it is Friday, but this Friday was different. I had to get up really early and take a ferry to the mainland to go to the chiropractor. That took 5 hours (I live on a small island). And now, someone is in the living room (where I usually write) working on our piano and so I am in my bedroom instead and I can’t focus. I mean, how could I possibly focus with the whole day so completely out of order? With a stranger in the other room the whole afternoon? It seems so obvious to me now that this would throw me off, but at the same time it seems incredible to me that I am so completely derailed. I feel like I can’t do anything. These days, since I am able to stick with my routine the vast majority of the time, it is easy to forget just how thrown off I get when that order gets disrupted. When it happens I always get so surprised (like today) until I remind myself of how much I rely on the structures I have put in place in my day-to-day life. On the other hand, I have no problem recognizing the exact same kind of rigidity in some of my other family members who seem completely unable to change the order of anything they ever do. To be honest, I get frustrated by their rigidity and can be oblivious to my own. I struggle with this reality both in my own life and as a coach, because ultimately I would love for us all to get to a place where we have some cognitive flexibility. Oooooooh, wouldn’t that be nice…to be able to make some adjustments in the moment when the day gets tweaked (because there are always some days that are going to get tweaked). But while that may be an end goal, it is not my current reality. So my first step is acceptance. Acceptance of what this day has been and what it means in terms of my to-do list. I am not going to be able to write the article I had planned. But as you can see…I am writing. I did a little experiment here. When I thought about writing the post I had scheduled, what felt the most impossible about writing it is having to look up all the sources to back it up because it was that kind of article. Lots of brain science kind of stuff. Today, it exhausts me to even think about having to back up every sentence I write with some hardcore science. Meh. But as it turns out, just checking in with where I’m at and then writing about my experience does not feel hard. And the fact that it even occurred to me do it shows a kind of pivot that I don’t think I would have been able to make in the past. Perhaps I am getting some cognitive flexibility after all! I am choosing to celebrate that as a small win for myself. And come to think of it, it is also a win that I did not push myself to write the other post when it truly was optional (this is my own blog after all—there is no employer pushing their agenda down my throat). Again, in the past I absolutely would have pushed myself to stick with the plan at all costs. But why? I think I get afraid that if I change anything in my structure, everything will fall apart. But it’s just not true. So it’s time for me to change that narrative. This is going to end up being a shorter post than usual, which initially sent another flashing red light to my nervous system, but I’ve decided to override it. A shorter post doesn’t have to be a problem if I can simply embrace the reality of the moment, celebrate my choice to stick with honesty and real experience, and accept that it is enough. We are always enough. Life continues to be challenging, and some days get derailed, but it’s ok. We are always enough. Would you like these posts delivered directly to your inbox each week? Subscribe for free on Substack: arikarapson.substack.com |